Feeling a little lost December 2018

31 2018. I really learned a lot this year, inside the classroom and out. While every day wasn’t perfect, the best days were quite magical. Sunsets at Golden Gardens, the first design retreat, nights on the roof in amsterdam, the list goes on and I’m pretty lucky that I can say that. While the past few weeks have been rough, things are looking up and now looking back, 2018 was pretty awesome. Happy New Year :)

29 I am content because I am content.

26 Jack called me out on being so analytical all the time. Not in a bad way, just that I should to chill out and just enjoy life more. He’s right, thinking can be overrated, time to go enjoy the waves crashing onto the beach. Sheesh, I need to go on a walk or do something to clear my mind. I haven’t really been able to do much since my second surgery :/. That’s definitely a contributing factor to everything that has been going on. Very excited to get back into climbing. Started thinking about episode two today… I’m don’t think I’ll ever be able to recreate the magic of home. I guess that is kind of the point. It’s still is scary to try and meet existing expectations for what I produce. If only I had more time, I would’ve finished all of them before I published anything.

25 Just pushed ep 1 – home live. Wow this is a special feeling. I’m really proud of it. I’m really happy with how it came out. I just have a big smile on my face. I am content. Goodnight <3.

24 Being disconnected last week was really nice. It’s kinda crazy how useless iPhones are when you don’t have service. While I’m glad I can reach my friends again, getting back online added a lot of stress to my life. The anxiety kicked in when I opened Instagram. I’m really starting to resent it. It’s stressful. Everyone’s life is so curated and polished. Where are the raw stories? How do you you create quality content that still feels genuine and honest?

16 Enroute to Florida. I’m excited to get on the cruise and relax a little. Being disconnected from the internet will be nice, though a little disorienting because of all the work I need to get done. I really do keep myself busy. I think it is a manageable amount of work though. Guess we’ll see…

15 As I was leaving the Chicago airport, I took a photo of the sunset. I think it’s a nice photo. But sometimes it feels too fake. Like one of those perfect moments that never existed. I just wanted to share a photo I took.

13 Fall quarter, junior year. I feel like this is the most I’ve learned in college. It’s been a rough few months. Damn it has been a rough few months. Nothing feels particularly new. In one word, predictable. It’s hard to stay hopeful when I feel like I’m only getting my hopes up. Damn that was kinda dark. While there certainly is something to be said about faking it until you make it, it doesn’t always work. I’ve been looking for the light switch for a while now. I think I’m getting closer. I’m ready to be surprised by the world again. I’m ready to smile a great big toothy grin.

11 I’m excited to be on a plane again. I think getting out of Seattle will be good for me. I don’t know what to write about today but I wanted to share something. Things are ok. My partner Tim and I filmed our final project today. Just need to edit and present now. It’s hard to think that the year is almost over. I’m excited to see family again. Excited to go home. Still feel like I have a lot of work to do; some days I’m still looking for the motivation to do it.

8 “Any chance you want to would like to go sit and talk somewhere?” And we would. Talking for hours, days, months until time disappears. Surfacing only in the awkward pauses that come—and they will come—as we realize we have said everything. Every word used, every topic exhausted. and there we will sit, in silence, warm and fulfilled, for in that moment, time has disappeared. Would you like to go sit and talk somewhere?

4 I wrote a whole thing about trying this again but it never saved. Anyway hey. I don’t know if this will be a regular thing but there is only one way to find out. If you read this, will you tell me? I would really like to know who is out there. I hope you’re having a good day.

Hey… October 2018

22 Hey. It’s been a minute a while. This are crazy. So crazy. Where are the constants. Where are the certainties? It’s time to dial it back and figure out what I want to spend my time on. I’ve never been so close to burning out before. This feeling, it’s a warning. It’s my body and mind begging me to slow down and it’s time I listened. Hopefully this week will be better. I plan to keep my evenings free to relax and recover. Personal time is something I have not been focusing on a lot since school started, at least, not in the way I need it.

I’m Back? September 2018


12The Water Crisis.

10Xbox Adaptive Controller This is amazing.

9I miss being busy. It’s hard to fall asleep at night when my days are so unproductive. Or at least they aren’t draining. I just hangout and then try to fall asleep. I miss being dead tired from working hard and being active. Additionally, I end up just laying in bed thinking. My mind racing about everything and nothing. Random todo items, etc. I am going to spend tomorrow fixing my journal app because I miss it and typing on my phone isn’t cutting it.

8Just watched Love, Simon. That was so wholesome. Wow that was wonderful and I just want to go hug Jack. The app I use to journal has been freezing these past few weeks, so every time I get in the mood to journal I end up frustrated and give up. On top of that things have been pretty busy. I just moved into a new house in Seattle and am still getting situated. But, it is time to start journaling again. Hey.

The Second Leg August 2018

24Quick update. Currently flying to Seattle. I’ve been redesigning my website and am excited for v2. As for journaling, I do intend to continue writing. Brian suggested having a more structured system for journaling? It seems like a good idea.

13Sad to say goodbye. It was a fun trip and what a lovely family in Madrid.

12I took my journal down. Well it’s still there, if you type in /2018, but if you click journal it will just take you to my hiatus page. I think it has lost its focus. I use to share my thoughts here, and my experiences. Now I just write a day to day about the country I’m in, but they aren’t even vivid. Because that’s not what my intention was, I was still writing from a reflective place not a descriptive one. I think it is ok to have both on my journal but I need to focus then and make clear decisions. Either write stream of consciousness or tell a story.

11Debating on if I want to keep my journal on the nav bar of my website. This site will soon be scoured by many employers and recruiters. Does this page create an added level of personality or will it be looked down upon? It is my voice. The big question is, now what. Where do I put my journal? Why keep writing it? Moreover, what am I writing on here these days? Time to take a break from journaling for a minute and think. Please reach out if you have any thoughts.

10We went to see a flamenco dance today! But, because we were with locals we were taken to an authentic show, rather than the touristy ones all over town. Just to give you an idea of the authenticity, the venue—Casapatas—is protected by UNESCO. It was amazing. I’ve never seen so much emotion and power in a dance. Definitely a highlight of my trip. I will also never forget the one woman behind me who shouted Olé more than a hundred times—don’t worry I have tallies in my notebook to prove it. The internship hunt begins. I have decided to start applying for everything and anything I come across. Of course I am aiming for the bigger opportunities over the summer but I want all the experience I can get. It’s time to tune out the designer ego of who has the fancier resume and work my hardest no matter the job.

9I had a realization today that I don’t need to figure everything out. Just gotta do what makes me happy on the day to day. I’m gonna see what happens when I just follow my heart. That was freeing. I do worry I won’t focus on any one thing though. I have many passions and get excited about so many things easily Do I want to go back to camp? Definitely missing it a little extra on their last day, lots of vivid memories.

8On the train to Madrid! Yes it is the right train…I hope. We did a lot of running around today, as with most days, but I think it is starting to catch up with me. Jam packed days full of exploring amazing cities plus the insane heat of the summer, limited hydration stations, the absence of full meals, and staying up late will do that to ya. It has been an awesome trip but I think I need to slow down a little if I am gonna survive the last few days. Excited to do just that in the mountains of Madrid—at least a little bit. Finally cooled down now that is is night, and I’m just relaxing, sitting in a hammock. I could get used to this. Antoni Gaudí was a genius. He used to suspend chains to create models with gravity and then flip the whole design using mirrors. True inspiration from nature, that was his big thing.

7Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by photography. I’ll see these amazing photos online and then look at my shots, they just feel so pointless. What do I want to capture? Why? Saw these kids skateboarding and I thought about stopping to take some photos of them but then I paused and asked myself why? Am I trying to capture people? People I know? Dogs? The streets? I’ve got no clue. For now I think I will just keep working to get better, this way if I ever figure it out, maybe I’ll be ready. We went on a super cool graffiti walking tour today! Great find by Val. If you’re ever in Barcelona, go check out Barcelona Street Style Tours. Like the Berlin tour for Ryan, this one was certainly a stand out experience for me.

6The Kite Runner is getting pretty intense. Besides the necessarily slow first chapter, I’ve been enjoying it a lot! Barcelona seems cool! Excited to actually see the city tomorrow since it is midnight and we are finally unzipping our suitcases. Oh wow I have missed air conditioning. It was nice to have a lazy day in Paris We’ve been running around so much these days that I haven’t had a chance to journal which is good and bad. It means life is full and that is exciting! But, I also know that taking the time to reflect and appreciate each day is important to me and my mental health. Walls are closing in a little. The apartment in Paris was tiny and Val and I haven’t been apart for more than a bathroom break since arriving in Berlin.

5Today was free museum day in Paris!??! We went to d’Orsay and the Centre Pompidou, home of the National Museum of Modern Art, all for the price of standing in line a little bit longer than usual. What a long day it was, also ran around to see Notre Dame and Sainte-Chappell. Finally had a sit down dinner after days of snacking and random meals. It was really nice to just hangout and chat for a few hours. Photography is hard.

4Versailles day. Wow. What a beautiful place. Also, Rick Steves gives great free audio tours. (Shout out to Val’s obsession with the well traveled man for knowing about them.) After a full day at Versailles we decided to go find a hotel to sit in and catch up on work. Not gonna lie it was awesome. Finally feeling a little more on top of everything. The AC and beautiful lobby was also wonderful.

3Called my parents from the lawn of the Eiffel Tower today. That was really nice. It is hard to chat often when we are on such different time zones and our schedules are so busy. I miss them. Whoever (me) thought it was a good idea to “just stay up” for their 6am alarm to go to the airport was wrong. I ended up getting a few hours of sleep and then passing out on the plane but now—in the middle of the day, while exploring Paris—it is starting to hit.

2We went on the Berlin Alternative Tour today! Ryan told me that from all of the experiences from him and Adam’s year long trip around the world, the alternative tour in Berlin was one of those stand out experiences for him. Definitely the best pitch I’ve heard. I have to say it was definitely the coolest tour I’ve done so far A bunch of friends from UW all met up for the evening! It was cool to see various UW friend groups all coming together for some fun.

1Wow that was fast, I am not ready for it to be August yet. I’m gonna blink and school will be starting back up. Getting to slow down at home will help me get but I’ve still got a little more traveling to do first. Berlin is quite the boppin city! Val is whipping me back into shape with all of this walking, but we’ve also been able to see a lot of the city because of it. Hope it will cool down a little more in the next few days, not sure how much more direct sunlight I can take when it is 95 degrees out. I’m gonna miss all of the Spätkauf, you can find one these connivence stores on every corner and they’re open 24/7.

Amsterdam. July 2018

31Usually travel days are hectic but this train ride is quite pleasant. What a beautiful view from the train—wind turbines and forests the far as the eye can see. Feeling very at peace at the moment, that might change once I get back to a busy city but I do love these slower moments. Currently listening to: Bedford Falls by Ford. Update: I’m on the wrong train. Literally two minutes after writing that last bit the ticket person came by. Agghhh. Trying to laugh it off but I just want to get to Berlin. The man sitting across from me had the same connection and helped guide me through the Hanover train station. Feeling better now that I’m going the right way. Had to make the mistake at least once in order to learn. Finally in Berlin! WOOoooo. Val and I dropped our bags and got moving, lots to see. It’s nice to be traveling with a close friend, having someone on your team definitely makes exploring less scary, at least for me. We met up with a buddy of mine from UW and checked out a jazz bar, it was way too hot stay for long but still a fun night. All the daytime activities make it hard to go out at night though. I am dead.

30Made a pal at the hostel today which was good because I probably would not have gone walking around Hamburg by myself. It’s a cool city, but not sure how many more days I could spend here. Thats ok though, this was really just a quick stop to relax. Tomorrow I set out for Berlin.

29Said goodbye to my brothers this morning. It was hard laying back down as loneliness set in. Until they left, it never really hit me that I would be back on my own again. I wish I could teleport back to camp right now. It’s safe there. For now I am going to focus on getting to Hamburg and putting my bags down in the hostel. Having a goal will be a good distraction, at least for a little bit. While waiting for the metro to Amsterdam Centraal a—I think—homeless man started shouting at me in dutch, then english: “What the fuck are you looking at”. He walked up to where I was sitting and I tried to look away as he stood over me, barely enough room for a suitcase between us. I was scared. I’m still a little shaken up about it. He ended up walking away after what felt like the longest minute of me trying to act like I didn’t notice him, him learning I didn’t have any cigarettes, and a fist bump. It definitely deescalated pretty quickly but it was a reminder that would not have been able to do much if I ran into trouble; it’s quite hard to run away with all of your bags, and I can only use the element of surprise once. I’d like to think someone would’ve helped me but who knows. On the train to Hamburg. Doei Amsterdam, I’ll miss ya.

28Feeling extra unproductive today. I have a couple big to-do items that I want to work on and I have not made much of a dent. I want to design v2 of my website, I want to sort through and edit photos from Europe, I want to read more, and I still need to write a final paper for my summer program. Looking forward to taking it easy in Hamburg for a second. My plan is to get a full nights sleep, wake up and drink a cup of tea by the water. It will be nice to slow down for a minute before the next leg of my trip.

26Back in Amsterdam for the weekend. It’s really nice to be back in a city I know—at least a little bit, and I get to show my brothers around!

25We took electric mountain bikes up the Trollstigen mountain road today. It was scary getting back on a bike where you have to put your weight forward. On the way down the crash kept playing over and over in my head. I made it down safely but it really felt like I could’ve flow over at any minute. It is going to take a little bit before I will be comfortable going downhill on a bike. I taught Dad what a ‘bump’ is, now we’re making a playlist.

241 am. This is the darkest it will get tonight and I can still see across the water. Adam helped me take a few long exposure shots and then I setup a time-lapse to run until morning. We’ll see how it comes out. Being in a car most of the day with the whole family and then sharing a two person hotel room with both of my brothers is starting to catch up with everyone. It doesn’t help that my headphones decided to stop working at the peak of it all. I just need my own space but I don’t want to take the time with my family for granted.

23Back on the road heading North. It seems the further up we go, the prettier it gets. Part of our route today included a ferry. Always take the ferry—especially when you’re surrounded mountains. Girl from North Country came on as we got off the ferry. It was very fitting. Currently listening to: Blowin in the Wind by Bob Dylan. I haven’t listened to this song in a while but never fails to take me back to my childhood. This trip—albeit tiring at times with all the driving and mishaps (parking, housing, car troubles, etc.)—is awesome. Oh my god, I think we just got air in a nine passenger van.

22Journaling everyday is hard when you don’t have a set routine. I usually try to jot things down on my phone but it ends up piling up and I think my entries are lacking because of it. We went on a fjord speed boat tour in Flam today. This place feels like the set of a Wes Anderson film. So many small towns, completely cutoff from society, except for by boat—and they’re cute too. After the fjord tour—that’s fun to say—we had to drive two and half hours to Bergen which isn’t terrible but we were all exhausted and hungry from such a long day so it was rough to learn that there is literally no where to park in Bergen. After an hour and a half of searching we gave up and parked on the side of the street, hoping we don’t get a ticket. Update: we totally got a ticket. And, it turns out the few parking garages around town might have actually fit our giant van.

21First full day in Norway! Today we drove from Oslo to Voss—5.5 hours—on a two lane highway that looked like squiggles on a map. Apparently it’s one of the main roads throughout the country!? It was a slightly hectic start when the rear view mirror fell and our accommodation in Voss was not returning our calls but it’s really nice being with my family—and what a better place than Norway. This place is exactly what I needed after living in a dense urban environment with little outlet for the better part of a month. Oh how I’ve missed the outdoors.

20All moved out! I tried not to look back when I left. It was a great program and I’ll miss the group, but I am also looking forward to traveling for the next month and this was a part of the journey—though, I do hope we will all stay in touch. Last night I had a conversation with a friend about privacy and data. Loved getting a new perspective on such a present issue. This conversation is not nearly as prevalent in the United States. Rarely does someone say “hey, what does Google do with all of my data?” and that was really interesting to address.

19Last day. I’m glad I decided to take the leap and do this program. In the end it was really cool to learn something new and step out of my comfort zone. It was also a great intro to Europe, both the course and Amsterdam itself. Most people speak English, my days were structured, and I had a group of people to go explore the city with. Super excited for the next few weeks though. First Norway with with my family, a few days of traveling by myself, and then some boppin around with Val! I think I am beginning to really understand the importance of walking a mile in someone else’s shoes. Yesterday, a friend in the program banged up her elbow quite a bit and while she didn’t break anything she is struggling to use her arm; I think she is beginning to understand what I’ve been going through. There are designers who will wear a sling, for example, when researching one handed products and that is so valuable. There really is no better way to understand someone else’s world than to live in it.

18My parents are here! It was really nice to hangout with them and grab dinner. They’re in town a little bit early but I most likely won’t see them again until Friday since tomorrow is the last day of the program and things will be pretty hectic.

17Had to say my first goodbye to a travel friend today. Goodbyes are different when you don’t know the next time you will see them again. Life without hugs sucks. Being in a new place with a new group of people often means rebuilding your support system—and finding new people who give good hugs. I think I’m going to work on using less contractions, while I do like the casual tone of my writing I think my voice and tone could certainly be developed more.

16Today we talked about the intersection of food and art in lecture, then we went to the Rijksmuseum for the afternoon! It’s a beautiful day and even though I am exhausted from traveling, I’m glad I went back and explored the rest of the museum after class. It was a little overwhelming because it is quite a large museum but I had a free ticket and an audio guide to keep me moving through it.

15Travel day. Woke up and left the Airbnb to go see a few art museums in Basel before taking the train back to Zürich, and then a flight to Amsterdam. Wooooo. - In the Neubau there was an awesome exhibition on Sam Gilliam. His work is so cool! There was a box of jazz music and headphones and it made me so happy. Music is so powerful. Had a wonderful conversation on the flight back to Amsterdam. A one hour flight and we chatted about tech, life, politics for the time. She even told me to come visit the french part of Switzerland and say hi if I ever do! I think connecting with people and talking to others is helping me feel more confident in myself and more comfortable in Europe. It also is exactly what I was hoping to get out of my trip abroad—alternative viewpoints and life stories—and that is awesome.

14Waking up in a new place, after sleeping on a stiff pullout couch is a great recipe for homesickness. Excited to get moving and see Basel but am missing everything and everyone back home and that is hard to shake. Since being in Europe I have not had the chance to meet or talk to many people. I think I have been nervous that they wouldn’t want to talk to me either because I’m American or because people here just don’t like to make chitchat. Yuansi has encouraged me to try and talk to more people and I’m getting a little bit better at it! Had a really nice conversation with a father down by the Rhine hopefully more to come.

135am. Early mornings are so quiet. Q: Why do you have to open the window shade on planes before taking off? Zürich is beautiful. Wow. Really glad I decided to stick around with another person from my food program What luck that we were on the same plane going to Switzerland together. I have a feeling that if I was by myself I would’ve just found a place to sit down and hung out for a little, maybe gone to a museum. It’s hard to explore a city with your travel bag—even if it’s just a messenger bag, it gets heavy on one shoulder! Finally in Basel. It’s been a long day but also a really good day.

12Sometimes I feel very out of place in class, and dumb. Most of the time I can keep up, but today’s discussion was hard to follow. Realizing how quickly my time in Amsterdam is coming to an end. It’s time to start checking off things on my list of places to go in Amsterdam!

10Class was really cool today! The course is called The Urban Food Experience and is best described as an anthropology course on food and cities. Beyond Passwords. what if a device could evaluate not only your password but the way you type it—to ensure that you are, in fact, you? I have always been interested in redesigning the login experience so this was neat to read. What happens when the system fails though? Say I am forced to use my computer differently because of an injury and the system decides I am not really Jacob. We still have a ways to go.

9Not sure that I like having images on the journal. It pulls the focus away from the text and takes up a lot of space. Stay tuned. So tired. The days are busy and it’s hard to not stay up when everyone else is. It was nice to finally have a lazy evening, eat some pizza, and watch a movie.

8I think I’ve come up with a faster way to push my journal entries online! This is a test… Update: it worked! Shaving off steps just makes it easier to keep this page up to date. Went to the Pure Markt in Amstelpark today. I’ve haven’t had such a delicious strawberry in a long time. Such a lively market, and a lovely bike ride on the way back. Amsterdam is quite the place.

7Went on a day trip to Den Haag! What a beautiful area right outside of Amsterdam. If I were to live in the Netherlands, I think I would live here. A group of us from the study abroad program went to the beach and it was a lovely day. Also, I went swimming!? I only got a few strokes in before my right arm got tired but progress is progress! Maybe I will swim when I get back to school, it seems like a safe way to rebuild my muscle.

6First day off since getting here. I’ve ended up spending a lot of my morning sitting around and now I’m starting to feel lonely and like I’m wasting my time. Time to get moving. Second half of the day now. Finally catching up on all of this journaling. Still feeling a little bummed but music and sunshine helps. I need to remember that sometimes doing nothing is ok and that taking the time to focus on myself is really important. Brad Smeele, “professional Wakeboarder turned quadriplegic”. This man is an inspiration. I discovered his Instagram today and it was moving to see his posts over the past few years since his injury. He writes a lot about coming to terms with his new life and how life can change in a split second and I really connected with that. Currently listening to: Ghost by VHS Collection.

5Wow, the first week is already over. That went by a lot faster than I thought. Looking forward to relaxing this weekend and hopefully exploring the Netherlands a little more.

4Happy Fourth! So weird to celebrate here. I’m usually up north, celebrating in Minocqua. A group of us recreated American foods and we rode a boat through the canals for the night. Didn’t get to see any American flags or fireworks though, certainly not the same as summers up at camp but still a night to remember.

3Today was a really good day. We biked around to a lot of different markets and food distribution locations and it was super cool. Met up with Robin! It was a lot of fun getting to hangout at the local spots and not have to worry about anything. Starting to feel more comfortable here for sure.

2Today is the first day of class. I’m starting to settle in a little bit more. There are still a lot of things to figure out and hopefully a lot of people to meet, but so far it’s not exactly what I was expecting. I like that it’s a small program but I do worry that we will not expand outside of this tight knit group. Meeting new people—ideally not American—and learning about other’s culture is a big reason I chose a city where everyone speaks English. Turns out the program is quite reliant on using bikes for the field trips and I will need to rent one to keep up. My first ride was terrifying. They are cruiser bikes, which is good because I definitely would not be able to ride a normal bike. The second ride, going back home from campus, I was able to go at my own speed and it felt extremely liberating. I feel like I can explore the city and do my own thing a little bit more now. It’s too easy to get caught up in staying with the crowd.

1Missing UW and all of the awesome people that go there. I forgot that you can’t just start conversations about camping or sustainability with random people. Only at UW.

Two Down, Two to Go June 2018

30Back to finding balance in my life. It’s really hard to be present here while also wanting to stay connected with the people who matter most to me back home. Behind the Design a playlist of Vox videos on my favorite topic. They all seem so interesting.

29Coffeecompany is my home for the next few hours until I can move into my apartment. The first song I hear over the speakers when I sit down is Wild World by Cat Steves—what good timing. I was pretty nervous about getting to the campus housing at first but everyone seems cool!

27-28Currently sitting in the Dublin airport waiting to fly to Amsterdam—my home for the next month. Just got off a plane that took off yesterday. It’s tough to journal right now. Things have been pretty hectic and I’m still trying to update the past few weeks or so. Hopefully once the jet lag wears off I’ll have more motivation to write about the program and my trip abroad. Watched Battle of the Sexes on the plane. I think that was the first movie I’ve payed close attention to the shots, specifically composition, lighting, and color. Overall a really good movie, from the cinematography to the acting and writing, the credits rolled and it felt extremely resolved. Finally in Amsterdam! Currently exhausted and a pretty disoriented but it seems like a really cool city. I’m excited to move into my apartment and meet people in the program, it’s pretty lonely at the moment in this hotel room.

25Time to learn how to edit my photos better. I want them to accurately represent the moment. Story truth versus real truth ya know? Can you edit photos in premiere? Say I wanted to change the blacks of a photo over time? That could look really cool.

24Had a bondfire on the beach with Jack, Matt, and Val. What an awesome night. I brought my camera and took some cool photos and videos. I think i’m getting better at this photography thing. Still had some good shots out of focus but I also had some decent photos! I want to start putting together little edits with all of the footage / photos I have. Got to spend some time with Adam earlier. It was really nice to just chill with him. Super excited be together with the whole family in Norway after my summer course and then with my brothers in Amsterdam for a few days.

23T-minus 4 days until I leave, still need to pack basically everything. We’ll get there, I just wish I could spend my last few days hanging out and nailing the little things rather than the big stuff. Still not getting a lot of sleep and I think it’s starting to add up.

22Ryan and I talked for a while about hostels and I’m starting to figure things out and turn to my brothers more when I have questions. Everyone but me has been to Europe so it is tough getting so many differing pieces of advice. Definitely getting more excited, and Val and I finished planning more of our trip! Shout out to the Currywurst Museum for the most ridiculous couch I can’t wait to sit in. I want to take the time to add photos to this journal but I fear I will fall into a world of editing. My rule for editing is to use my power to make the photo as true as possible. I should stop staying up so late but it’s the only time I get to hangout with my parents and I love hanging out with my parents.

21This study abroad trip in Amsterdam is about to happen and I do not feel ready. I’ve never been to Europe, I don’t know anything. It certainly doesn’t help that I do not have full mobility and cannot lift more than 5 lbs of weight on my right side. I wish I could just sit down with a seasoned traveler learn everything there is; rather than all the slow reading and rereading of confusing forums and FAQs to make sure I know how the train system works. Planning is stressful but making sure you’re not getting screwed over or wasting your time is exhausting. I spent all day trying to figure out how to book train tickets, in-between trying to hangout with people before I leave, and planning to get the most out of Val and I’s short stays in some of the most amazing cities. Oh yeah, and trying to coordinate plans with people who are already in a different time zone.

20I can’t wait to get my sling off and start rebuilding the muscles in my shoulder. I know the first few days will be hard but I’m really excited to seem more tangible improvements. It’s been a lot of waiting around for the past few weeks and while I know the bone is healing, I wish I could see an x-ray or some sort of progress. Update: Just received an email from the doctor to take it off. This is such a weird feeling.

18Jack, Matt, and I went to a web series premier for a show called The T. It’s about queer and transgender people living their lives in Chicago and it tackles a lot of serious issues without feeling too forced. It was an interesting moment to understand how similar we all are, each of us vulnerable and fragile humans. Also to see the micro-aggressions and day to day struggles those who are different often face. Jump cuts with the same framing are a great way to show the passage of time.

14On the plane :). I’m excited to go home, to start the next chapter and the summer. At the same time I will miss this year a lot. It wasn’t all awesome, life rarely is, but it was really good. I learned a lot about myself and the person I want to be. I made some good friends and I’m starting to find my people. I’ll miss ya sophomore year.

13I leave tomorrow for home. Lots of reflecting at this moment—this was a big year for me.

12I went downtown with Emma and Alyssa to take photos and learn more about shooting in full manual. After an hour or so at Pike Place we wandered into a Design within Reach store and started sitting in all of the famous chairs we studied in design history. It was really cool to really appreciate the chairs in person. Ryan is here! I haven’t seen my middle brother in a while so I’m excited to show him around Seattle and hangout.

8I’m a junior now? Finals ended yesterday, it’s always so anticlimactic. Time to switch gears and start thinking about packing up and heading home. I won’t feel done until I’m out of Seattle—I wonder if it will always be like this. Really happy to be taking a break from design for the summer. I’m just tired of school and work and need this summer to do something else and expand my identity—design can’t be the only thing I do.

6Today was one of those days I really wish I could’ve used my right arm. Between cleaning dishes and doing my laundry, I’m extremely grateful for Val and everything she has helped me through. It sucks not being able to do things for yourself but I’m not asking to for any breaks, things could be worse and there are a few people that need them more than me.

4I slept in pretty late but I woke up feeling really good! My shoulder hurts less than normal and my exercises aren’t as hard to do. Laying in bed right now and I feel at peace. Oh, that was fast. The pinching pain in the beginning of my collarbone is back. Don’t take the pain free moments for granted I guess…

2Starting to figure out how the laser cutter works, specifically with the material I am going to use. Today I ran some test cuts and narrowed down the exact tolerances I will need for everything to fit together. Laid in bed for most of the day, it’s the only place I can type with two hands. While it sounds nice, by the middle of the day I felt like the walls were closing in on me.

1Val and I went to see The Kooks tonight. She has the best smile. It was an awesome concert! I don’t listen to a lot of The Kooks but I really should. It worked out better than I expected for my collarbone but definitely still hurt by the end. Val emailed ahead to see if they might be accommodating, nothing came of it but it really meant a lot to me. Bought a bunch of useless wood today. So that sucked. Didn’t get a chance to test my laser cuts for our ID final and I need to do a lot of planning so test cuts are vital.

Twenty. May 2018

30Today was rough. I woke up sick, on top of being in pain from my collarbone, and it made me even weaker and groggier. I’m feeling a little bit better now and am so grateful for that. Not having your health is the worst. Went to the doctor today. They told me that I won’t be able to fully weight my shoulder until the three month mark. This is gonna make traveling through Europe a little trickier. Really looking forward to feeling better at the six week mark though—that’s when I will finally be able to take off my sling. We turned in our chairs today for Design History. It was really cool to see everyone else’s finished product. I forgot how supportive we are of each other—it’s awesome.

29Got dinner with Joe today. We eded up talking for two hours—it was great. Really glad we got to catch up. I was telling Katie about camp today and the nostalgia came rolling back. It’s gonna be weird being somewhere else this summer but it feels right. I will never forget that place though—I don’t think I ever could.

28Watched Kodachrome on the flight back to Seattle and it really hit me. It had an air of nostalgia yet still felt modern and even though it was a little predictable, it still worked. I think I want to start taking more photos with intention, maybe even learn how to shoot film. First, I need to figure out why exactly I want to take these photos. I forgot to take a family photo when I was home :(. Two weeks and I’ll be back. In the mean time, I need to start taking photos with the people at school.

25-28I went home for the weekend. It was nice to relax and hangout a little. Forgot how at peace I feel sitting by the fire pit in my backyard. I could sit there forever, just watching the flames as music plays.

22I turned in my Industrial Design project today. It was my way of proving I could still do things while in a sling and it felt really good. I couldn’t have done it without the help of Flyn, Joe, my parents, and a lot of kids in my class, but we got it done and no one can take that away from me.

21It’s amazing how quickly the small day to day stressors lose importance when you’re worried about your health.

18Surgery went well. I was a little anxious before hand but now I am just on the road to recovery. It does feel like a slight step backwards though. Just as the pain was starting to become manageable and I was getting a hang of dealing with the break, I open it back up. In the long run it will be the better decision though. Sometimes we have to take one step backwards before taking two steps forward.

17Design Happy Hour was fun. It’s intimidating to talk to the upperclassmen in design but I try to meet at least one new person. Got dinner with my parents. It’s really nice to have them around. My dad cut my food for me—since one arm is in a sling. Tomorrow is the surgery.

15There is a big difference in asking someone to open a banana versus asking someone to help me get dressed, but I need help with both. Definitely missing my mom. A couple climbing friends invited me to Golden Gardens to grill and have a bondfire. It was really nice to just hangout and forget about everything for a little bit. The charm did wear off with the Tylenol though.

14Day two. This is rough. I need to start learning how to ask for help because I can’t do this by myself.

12I broke my collar bone. Fuck. It’s more an inconvenience than anything else. Could certainly do without the pain though. To distract myself through the shock I kept asking questions about the ambulance design and also cracking jokes. Also, GE makes X-Ray machines? The more you know. Time to find a decent dictation tool. Apple’s built-in one sucks and typing with one hand is already getting old. Do they design keyboards for one handed use?

11This day has been way too hectic for my taste. Also, booking hotels and places to stay in Europe is stressful. I think my least favorite phrase is now “reservation going fast”—doesn’t that just stress you out? It’s these days that notifications only add to my stress. I’m turning Do Not Disturb on. If you need me, call three times. I think I’m gonna read something by Sherman Alexie next.

10I am really lucky. I have very little to complain about and life is good. I just don’t have enough time to enjoy it, and that sucks.

9Is Silicon Valley a modern day Detroit? Will it too meet its doom? No one during the early 1900s would’ve thought that Mow-town would ever slow down. This is a dangerous mindset to fall into. One day things will surely move on, won’t they? I have no clue, but I’ll let you know if I come up with anything. The Tarot Cards of Tech. We think it’s time to ditch the Silicon Valley mantra, “Move fast and break things” for a new approach: Slow down and ask the right questions. These are thought provoking and awesome. Definitely bookmarking.

8Am I satisfied in Design? I want to come back to this. Some days yes, some days no. Is there anything else I could see myself doing? With (95%) confidence I want to say no. What a busy day. Just finished my todos for today (1:23 AM). Tomorrow will also be quite busy. I know I like to stay busy and involved, it means I hit the pillow harder, but that might not always be the best thing?

7Today was a very decent day. I felt lost in the Visual Storytelling class. Crit was not helpful and I left the studio wondering what the point of the couse even was. Woodshop was fun! We planed all of our wood and began planning out the various pieces of our furniture piece . My group and I are going to build Rietveld’s Steltman Chair. Confused what the goal/value of understanding visual storytelling is. I’m getting tired of all the red tape between idea and execution. I understand that research and planning is important but execution is one of the most valuable parts. Gotta have confidence that sometimes you might be right, even if everyone else doesn’t see it.

5–6I went to the Western Washington Waterski Tournament this weekend! It was awesome getting back out on the water again, I really missed waterskiing. Hopefully I will be able to run the course at 30 mph by the end of the month. Found my rhythm again which felt really good.

4Cobra Kai. A modern day twist on the original The Karate Kid. The first two episodes are free on YouTube and I’m really digging it so far.

3How do you chose to hire specific people? How do you decide who is qualified? I feel like I have a good judge of character and personality but what about work ethic and skills, what then? Do I just trust that same gut? Just saw Rainbow Kitten Surprise live and it was awesome.

2What a beautiful day it was today. Glad I got to spend a decent amount of it playing soccer outside. I should take my watch off more often and just play. It’s nice to forget about time for a while.

Hello. April 2018

30The past week has been a lot of prep work and it is draining. I’m sure it sweetens the payoff, but the light on the other side isn’t that bright as of now. Today might have been an ID day. I finished my project, a desk organizer, and being able to hold it in your hands is a pretty neat feeling. It definitely helped that today’s IxD class was a headache. We got no where with our ideas and had very little help :(. Finally got to climb again! So good to be back.

29If you carefully consider what you want to be said of you in the funeral experience, you will find your definition of success. – Stephen Covey I messed up. I was quite rude to an employee who was just doing their job and enforcing the rules. On the way out they were no longer there for me to apologize. So instead I told the manager and asked her to pass it along. We all make mistakes, the least we can do is acknowledge them and aim to do better going forward. The Idaho Stop.

27I want to do a better job keeping my involvement levels consistent. I love being busy but can never keep up. Chatting for hours is definitely one of my favorite things. I think I definitely prefer it in a quite, cozy setting over just outside on the side of the street though.

26Sat in on Marks and Symbols today—what an awesome lecture. I really hope I can take that class at some point. The lecture was introducing their second project, the icon set. I don’t have much time right now, but maybe I will try to make an icon set this summer.

25Spent a large part of my day working in the wood shop. I learned a lot. It’s intense work. Planning, thinking three-dimensionally, and being extra conscious of safety procedures. I made a couple mistakes on my foam mold but a friend told me that it was all ok and that we need to make mistakes to learn. Such a simple thing yet so important to remember.

24I’ve never had so much trouble staying focused on one task. I think this is a mix of sleep deprivation and Polyurethane foam dust from the shop. I’m mad at myself for staying up so late, it always sets me back. SongShift. Finally making the switch from Apple Music to Spotify. I’m excited to start discovering music again. Apple Music is just not cutting it, crashing and bugging out more often than I would prefer.

23I want to spend more time working on the front page of my website. At the moment all it says is what and where I’m studying and a few of my hobbies. I want to add more that is representative of who I am and what I value. Today in Visual Storytelling I heard the word accessibility more than I have in the classroom in the past two quarters. Today feels like an IxD day. Turns out Microsoft has a word for the type of design—I think—I want to pursue: Inclusive Design. This is so awesome.

22Took a break from all of my work to help the climbing team strip down the walls of the gym for the upcoming competition. I missed those guys. I think not climbing is a part of the reason I’ve been down. Not being active can definitely do that to ya.

21I realized that I’ve bitten off more than I can chew responsibility wise. Time to slow down and reassess where I want to spend my time. This is really important, to my wellbeing and my effectiveness in the responsibilities I value most.

17There is nothing I enjoy more than sitting outside in the sun, listening to the wind blow through the trees. Water Sports is now Waterski Club/ Waterski + Wakeboard Club/Waterski at UW. It’s gonna be a lot of meetings to figure everything out, but that’s ok, it’s necessary.

16Back in the bike shop today, I’ve been meaning to do some routine maintenance on my bike, I just never knew what that really meant. Since biking is so key to me getting around right now, I figured it was time to go learn. Lot of super friendly people in that shop. Finally posted my speed reading idea on facebook to find some people to help make it. We’ll see what happens. Whoa I’m become busier than I realize. Time to start triaging todos and focusing my energy back on me. Going to try to workout more. Specifically cardio, since I don’t get any at climbing. Wish me luck.

15I want to do a better job telling the people in my life how important they are to me. They really are so amazing, each and every one of them in their own way.

14What a long hour it has been. After sleeping away most of the day, I finally got on my bike to do some work in the art building. Two minutes into my ride my back wheel decided to pop out of the rear dropout and I had to limp home, carrying my bike. Some nice folks offered me a ride but I was so close that it didn’t really matter—it meant a lot though. After finally fixing my bike, I got soaked on the ride to art. At first I was upset and soggy but then decided to just embrace the rain and rode through all the puddles I saw along the way. Sometimes all you need to do is change your perspective :).

13Doc says I have a semi-torn Extensor Hallucis Longus. Just gotta take it easy for a week or two and help it heal. Until then I’ll be riding my bike so I can walk/limp less. Took some time to work on my bike finally. It’s always a little intimidating since I don’t know how to do anything but the ASUW Bike Shop is full of super good people that are happy to teach on the fly. Today I learned how to true a wheel.

12After our ID presentations today, a big group went to ShareTea and hung out. Aside from being exhausting, it was fun getting to hang out with everyone in the studio and then get tea together. I’ve heard that ID is the closest group because they are all working in the studio together—I definitely understand that now. I hope I will still hang out with them next year if I end up focusing on Interaction Design (IxD). Feeling apart of something, specifically a community of like minded people is so important to me.

11It’s so late. My partner and I didn’t work on the bulk of our Industrial Design (ID) project until the last minute—very unlike me. The project isn’t due until 12:30pm, tomorrow, so we will reconvene in the morning to finish it. Oh boy. Signing off at 2am, April 12th.

10We’re a team…and defeats are softened and victories sweetened because we did them together. Water Sports Waterski + Wakeboard - UW might just be back in session! It’s all about finding the right people.

9The beginning of week three and I think I can say I’m starting to get the handle on my classes. First we’ll have to see how my first Design History quiz goes on Wednesday.

8I love movie trailers. It sets up a story where anything can happen. There as so many design tools out there and trying to stay current gives me anxiety. While I understand why there isn’t, I really wish there was a clear workflow or tool that ruled them all.

4Today was a little hectic, running around between classes. I was late to my first Design History class, which is a bummer since it’s only the second week but oh well. I think I’m starting to learn towards IxD again. I definitely want to be able to build things and learn those hard skills but I think Interaction Design is more me.

3I now remember what I don’t like about Industrial Design: the iteration process. Every time you make mistake or want to tweak something, you have to start all over. It gets old pretty fast. I finally got a chess board. It’s travel size so I can bring it with me and hopefully start games where ever I am. Currently playing myself and it’s a pretty even game.

2Happy Monday. I haven’t been journaling for a few days, trying to find that rhythm again. I know I say that a lot but I do think it’s helpful to acknowledge it. It gets me writing about something. Been rewatching Ever Frame a Painting videos and forgot how cool they are. Movies, Films, Shorts. I want to get better at making em. If only I could figure out how to change the f-stop while in video mode.

1Drive (2011) - The Quadrant System. Whoa this is crazy.

The Sprint March 2018

27Have you ever heard someone who isn’t a doctor speak about a specific medial issue at great length? People are forced to become experts on illnesses when their family is affected by one, it is very telling to me.

24Till next time Beaver Creek < 3. It really does feel like home away from home. What beautiful place. It was hard to say goodbye to my parents in the airport. It always is. It was nice to just relax and not have so many things to stress about. Why didn’t we take a single family photo? New rule: every time I get together with a family member, we take a photo. I’m tired of not having current photos of my brothers. Time to start figuring out Water Sports. It’s so easy to ignore, but spring is here. It’s now or never and honestly, I’m terrified of failing. It seems easier to just walk away and waterski every once in a while than try to make this club happen again. I need an awesome team to pull this one off. I was running different css files for /journal and /til (because of the way I setup the Jekyll sites) and it make tweaking things across the whole site a nightmare. Finally merged all of the edits back into one file, woohoo!

23I’ve figured it out. The /design page and individual project pages need a facelift. Time to start rethinking those. Re-organized my todo list for v2 of the site. Exciting stuff. (If you really want to see it, here ya go.) I’m sure many of the goals will certainly end up on the v3, but dream big right?

22SXSW 2018: The Designer’s Weakness. I posted this on Facebook after stumbling upon it. Everyone should watch this. As designers, it’s a great talk on the power designers (don’t know they) have and the importance of considering the projects we take on. As people, it’s an important discussion on power structures that exist and how those play into the privilege or lack of privilege in the status quo.

21Finally sitting down to rework the typography of my website. I still have a long way to go, but I’m starting to get the hang of it. Maintaining my website can get exhausting (updating the design, adding new projects, etc.) but also rewarding when I am finished. I fear that if I don’t pick a target, or figure out what impact I want to make, I will spread myself many directions and end up doing nothing. As I think about the kind of design work I want to do and the kind of impact I want to make, this keeps coming up. I want to do it all.

19I keep trying to sit down and update my journal, but I cannot seem to find the motivation to do so. I have ideas written down, but I cannot find the time to sit and flush them out.

13Sad to say goodbye to typography today. Annabelle made a comment about not seeing many of us until Senior year, except for in passing in the hallway. That sucks. I really enjoyed typography as well as Visual Design, and having to pick one focus is frustrating when I want to learn more about all of them. Hopefully, next year I will realize that picking one focus does not mean I won’t be able to develop Visual or Industrial design skills as well. Rest easy Dr. Hawking.

12In need of a hug and a break. Feeling particularly alone right now. I have been running around helping everyone else out and in all the chaos have forgotten to look inward. I need to slow down and start focusing on myself a little more. It doesn’t feel like anyone else is currently and my mom is two thousand miles away.

11Happy Birthday Val :) I am so tired. Just have not been getting enough sleep the past week and starting to feel it. Hopefully in between my final projects I will get some rest.

10Had a very reflective conversation with a friend in which I was asked some deep and open ended questions. Things like “what is the biggest lesson you’ve learned in life, and how did it help shape you”. It was kinda nice. Talking that deep definitely drains you a little though.

7–9These days came and went. I really just don’t remember anything from them. It was a lot of rushing to get work done in time for the next critique—I had one every day.

6Started to edit the weekend retreat video and the nostalgia is intense. I’m also really enjoying video editing and want to make more of these types of memory shorts. They’re part vlog, mostly shots with music overlaid and its just fun and nostalgic, I want to make more of these in the future. Definitely ignoring homework and responsibility in favor of making this video right now. It’s new and exciting and that is everything when I’ve been working on the same projects for weeks.

5Adam Kingman. This guy is the guy. The freaking man. It was super cool to hear him talk about just sending it and adventuring and learning along the way and just all of it was cool. Asked him to grab dinner in hopes that he would stick to his ‘say yes’ attitude. Luke, Adam, and I ended up talking for nearly two hours and closed down the Pho restaurant. I want to start a podcast where I have conversations with interesting people over ice cream or something fun and friendly like ice cream. It will be an opportunity to learn more about them, what they do, why they do it, and what get’s them out of bed in the morning. Also, I will finally be able to ask 1000 questions to people I want to learn more about without seeming weird. Time to go find a microphone…

4The retreat was awesome. A super fun weekend with a group of people equally as awesome—people that I would most likely never have gotten to hangout with if not for this weekend.

3Driving back from Stevens Pass to the house it felt like we were dancing with the moon. There was something really special about it.

2–4Went to Leavenworth, WA for the first (ever?) Design Retreat.

Chaotic Busy February 2018

28I want to update my design page with new work, time to start working on that… Sometimes letting go of an opportunity can be terrifying, yet the unknown future can be so exciting. I often, if not always, match the energy of the people I interact with. It is always interesting to discover another part of myself, and I often feel a closer connection with the person I am interacting with.

26Getting the rug pulled out from under you is never fun. The study abroad program I committed to just got canceled. Awesome. Back on that stress train I go. #ThatsHarassment This is pretty powerful. I am curious why one of them didn’t flip roles or consider same sex harassment, although I understand that in most cases the perpetrators are men in power.

24Time to start catching up with old friends. It’s easy to make empty friendships in college, following up and growing closer is something I have yet to crack.

23How do you find the balance between using anecdotal stories to create empathy versus using stats and facts to give an argument weight?

22Thursdays are definitely my most stressful days. I almost always have a critique on Friday morning and have to stay on campus past dinner to finish and print for it. Just talked to Luke for almost four hours straight. I needed that. Definitely been feeling a little lost lately.

21Pretty busy weekend, it was fun but I’m happy to be home. Totally forgot about a plugin I made a while back. I wonder if people still use it or would use it if I updated it… I still don’t feel like I really did anything. This is one of those projects where your solution just seems so obvious that you don’t want to take any of the credit. For some reason people loved it, it was on plugin lists, the design-sphere of twitter, I even got drafted to Dribbble for some reason. Weird. I miss journaling. Maybe I’ll try to find an excuse to write something because once I do, reflection just kinda flows.

17–19Gone to Duncan.

15You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. Haven’t heard that one in a while. Big fan of it though. I’ve always loved clichés like this one, there’s a reason they’re said so often.

14Costco Soft Serve is delicious. And dangerously cheap.

12Incredulous - adj. unwilling or unable to believe something I want to be more adaptable, specifically when activities or plans go awry. It can be hard for me to accept doing things differently, but adapting is so often the right call.

11 I think it’s gonna be a busy week. Certainly doesn’t help that I’m starting Monday off without enough sleep. It is extremely easy to stay up late and deprive yourself of sleep, yet it is so important to your mood and overall health to sleep at least 8 hours. Hopefully I can find a consistent bedtime routine in the coming weeks. I was just looking over the photos and video from the weekend in Eugene and I’m starting to find that videos are able to evoke a lot more emotion and memory than pictures can. Although I think both are valuable, I want to start recording more from now on.

10The climbing competition at the University of Oregon was super fun and I had an awesome time hanging out with everyone over the weekend. On the way back we stopped in Portland for dinner and I got to see Aaron Draplin again at the Portland Night Market. He remembered me which meant a lot. It felt a lot more casual to talk to him this time and that was super cool—he even gave me some feedback on my Hillel line illustration. I think meeting in a much more neutral territory certainly helped.

7Val asked me to design a t-shirt for Hillel. At first I was pretty intimidated and didn’t have any ideas. Then while browsing through Google Images I got inspired by those cool outdoorsy line illustrations. It felt good to be designing for fun again, not just working on another graded project. I wish I knew more about how to make the design more dynamic or just more visually interesting—although, I am pretty proud of it. Definitely excited to learn more about logo/icon design, it really is a whole other world.

5Its a bummer when I want to call people from home and the time change just messes everything up. Staying in touch with people far away is really hard and that bums me out.

4Went to a cafe and worked on the Design Methods group project for a few hours. Then we all went on a walk to the park and got to enjoy the sun. We didn’t talk about the project at all and I actually felt like I was getting to know the people in my group. It was awesome. Currently listening to: After the Fall by Kodaline. Something feels like its missing. I’m feeling kinda lonely and a little homesick. Perhaps tomorrow will be better, although is it a good thing to be too busy to be down?

2I miss journaling. I think I enjoy it more on my good days. To force my writing while I’m sad, or just not feelin it, feels disingenuous. A friend asked me what I want to do when I out of school and I think more and more I want to use design to help those less fortunate. I will most likely (hopefully) intern and work at a large design oriented company in the coming years, but in the long run I want to do something bigger. I’ve also started volunteering with ASUW Arts + Entertainment (A & E) recently—perhaps that will surprise me and I will find another path. In short: I really don’t know.

Shower Thoughts January 2018

30What a busy weekend. Its amazing how easy it is not to journal once I am away from my laptop and busy. Thinking about transitioning my whole site over to Jekyll, or at least the text of the home page to start. I just want to be able to edit everything quickly and easily. Working in HTML can become tedious very quickly. I want to do a better job in v2 of my site minimizing the amount of css classes I use. Why not just set styles for paragraphs, headings, etc? I partially do that now although there is plenty of room for improvements.

25I feel like I’m starting to scratch the surface of what is going on in the news. I’ve started reading the news and listening to The Daily a little more and trying to stay current. It’s nice to feel a little less uninformed when people talk to me about current events. Maybe one day I will know who my local representatives are. Embrace Innovations. We talked about this in Design Methods today. Quite the design challenge. These are the kinds of things I want to design—these are the impacts I want to make.

23Feeling good today. I just feel like I’m on top of my work. As though my todo lists are not controlling my life. Finally sharing what I think is my best piece of writing, go check it out. On his wrist, a watch sits weighing 2.22 ounces yet to him it feels like the heaviest thing he carries.. I think the reason I am so nit picky about the little details is because of how I was raised. My father taught me that if I was going to do something, to do it right. Every detail, down to the letter. Another shooting today… Reminds me of a site I found a while back. DaysSincetheLastMassShooting.com The FBI defines a mass murder or shooting as the killing of four or more people without an extended period of “cooling-off” by the perpetrator

21Some days I hate technology. I sit around staring at screens, and before I realize it the day is over and all I did was watch YouTube videos. Every once in a while I find myself being overwhelmed by all the work I need to do while at the same time not wanting to do anything. I just lay around, stressed by my inaction but lacking the motivation to move—it’s a frustrating paradox. Sharing the things you love with other people is such a vulnerable experience. Currently listening to: California by Sons of the East.

20Nothing like a good day on the mountain. Finally got out to Stevens Pass. Even if it was for a few hours, it was a few hours of solace. I wasn’t thinking about my homework or the things I need to do after class, I was free. This is why I love snowboarding (as well as waterskiing and rock climbing) so much. You need to completely present, otherwise you won’t get very far.

19Finally figured out how to build Things I Love as a Jekyll site. CSS Column Options. Will definitely be updating TIL more now that I don’t have to individually tweak every list item.

18Showers are one of my favorite places to think. When days are full constant rushing and watching the clock, being able to slow down time and relax is the best feeling in the world. I wonder how many people name their blog/journal “Shower Thoughts”—probably a lot… Instapaper and Instapaper to Kindle. Special thanks to Joe for sending me this. I can’t believe I haven’t known about this. Time to transfer all of my various saved articles to Instapaper. So stoked.

17Went on a little trip down memory lane today. Back in High School I was involved in a small community of young coders and creators. We were connected by age, our interest in tech, and hackathons. Many of us only knew each other from the various Facebook groups we were in and had never met in person. I probably gained two or three hundred facebook friends the year I joined this community and while many of them I know only from facebook, I still feel connected to them. It has been really interesting to see the many different paths people have taken, specifically how far some have strayed from tech. I want to read more but I really dislike reading on screens. I wish there was a way to read blogs and interesting web essays on a Kindle. I would also like to get better at writing, but I think journaling along with more reading will develop my writing further.

14I took a lot of photos in Portland. I just wish I was in more of them. Note to future self: Take more photos with you in ‘em. Selfies with wide lenses look pretty cool. Portland was a cool lil city! It certainly has a lot of character and I dig how everything is right next to each other. Its kinda small though, and maybe it was just because it was the weekend but I don’t know that I felt the hustlin bustlin vibe I get from bigger cities. Thats just my initial conclusion, definitely will be back for more though. I really don’t like how paragraphs look on my website right now :/. Hopefully I will learn a thing or two in Typography that will help me improve the readability.

13Portland bound!!! Met Aaron James Draplin today. I don’t know what I was expecting but it was kinda intimidating and small talk-ish. Makes sense that we didn’t start chatting like old pals but a kid can dream can’t he? He’s got a lot of wisdom that dude, and when I did start to get comfortable the conversations were pretty cool. Hopefully we will chat again some day and it will be a little less tense. Shout out to Val for not giving a fuck and countering all of his sass. Also, I cannot thank Aaron enough for letting us into shop—on a weekend no less. I got the door slammed in my face and it sucks man. It really means a lot that he took the time to pass on the torch so to speak.

10Spreed. Reedy Whoa, this is so awesome. This is how I want to read everything—at least the first time through. Idea for a project: A speed reader for pdf documents, specifically scholarly journals but obviously it would work for all writing. The idea is that the program would strip the journal of all text that the human eye generally skips over when reading and then presents the information in a highly customizable speed reading screen. Future versions could have accessible tables of content and other features, but the goal is to make lengthy, often dense journals accessible to everyone.

9Everything you see on social media is fake Jack sent me this video earlier today. It was super refreshing to have someone actually acknowledge how bullshit the social media world is with all its blue water and perfect everythings. It just makes everyone else feel inferior and then post something fake and the cycle continues. #FART When I travel, I hope that this journal will be a place of honesty even if my Instagram isn’t. Empathy is such an important concept to me. I feel like I’ve strayed away from that these past few years. I’m excited that design, specifically user research, will help bring empathy back into focus. Brené Brown on Empathy

8Stopped by the glass studio today, man I miss that place. Will definitely be in there as much as I can this quarter to get my glass fix. Val, Luke, and I are gonna go down to Portland for the long weekend and as a long shot I emailed Aaron Draplin to see if he wanted to meet up—for some pancakes (the pancakes were val’s idea). Who’s gonna say no to pancakes!? Instead of pancakes he invited us to his studio!!?? So stoked. Also, stay tuned for a possible speaking event with him at UW!!

7Moved Things I’ve Learned to a Jekyll page. I realized that was a page I would be updating often and by removing all the red tape I will be able to add to it without added hassle. Hopefully I will be able to move Things I Love over at some point too, I just don’t know enough about Jekyll templates at this point. Every new design project I begin to see the world in a different way. I doesn’t always last past the project but it is always extremely eye opening. Right now we are studying letterforms and have been taking photos of our initials as we find them in the world. There are a lot more Es than there are Js; there are so many Es. I need to figure out a way to automate commits right from Caret.

4I launched my website today (night), I’m excited to get feedback and make the next iteration even better, but right now I am done and that feels awesome. Went climbing tonight. I didn’t get to climb as much as I hoped but it was nice to see everyone again. Had my other two classes today, Sociology of Sexuality and Design Methods both seem exciting. Definitely feel like I’m ‘part of the problem’ in the Sexuality class though.

3First day of Winter quarter. Typography seems like a super cool class and I’m definitely excited for it. Almost done with the website. I’m realizing that the content is tripping me up more than the code. I’m worried I don’t have enough photos to fill up the various project pages and that is slowing me down.

2Watched The Edge of Seventeen, it fit a lot of those high school vibes that I went through. I just wish it spent more time working through the end of the movie. I don’t think things like that happen (literally) overnight. Big fan of Woody Harrelson’s character but I do wish he spoke some more ‘wise words’ that could be applied to the audience. Headed back to Seattle. I forgot how cold Chicago can be. It was really nice to be home for a minute though, always feels like a rush to see everyone before my next flight though :/.